The Kingdom of Heaven Belongs to Such as These

Matthew 19:14
But Jesus said, “Let the children alone, and do not hinder them from coming to Me; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

I have heard this verse many times and have always loved it. Ever since I was a very small child, I can remember wanting to get married and have lots of kids. I wanted to be just like my mom! I grew up seeing how much my mother loved babies and young children and this beautiful desire seemed to make sense to me. When I came into the Catholic Church, this made it very easy for me to accept an openness to life mentality. It just made sense, children are a gift and never a burden. How could a child bring anything but joy? Plus, God gave women this incredible gift that men physically can't do... we can literally grow a human being within us. It really is mind blowing if you think about it! 

The more we have been open to life, I have seen the beauty (and the sorrow) of what this openess really means. We have 4 precious babies on this earth and 2 in heaven. Being open to life has showed me that sometimes we get the incredible blessing of years with our children and sometimes its only a few weeks in the womb. Either way, every child has been an essential and vital part of our family and to God's plan in helping us all grow in holiness. 

On a daily basis, my children force me to grow and work on certain qualities within myself that if I did not have children would just be pushed aside. For instance.... my temper... It is so easy to just yell at the kids, especially in frantic or overwhelming moments. It takes more discipline though, to take some deep breaths, get control and calmly talk to them. Anger is truly a sin of pride and it is very easy to jump to that in the heat of the moment. With my children, I get lots of practice with this! Its a funny thing, children.... God made them easily ready to forgive and move on. There is so much we can learn from this! 

Just the other day I was given a great example of humility and obedience through my two sons. I had ordered a veil to wear at mass and they knew it had come in. On the way to mass, my 5 year old asked me if I was going to wear it. I told him, "oh I don't know.... I am feeling a little nervous about it". He immediately said, "Mommy, why would you be nervous? Saint Mother Teresa wears one!" and the 4 year old chimes in, "And Mother Mary!" Then the 5 year old again, "See mommy, there is nothing to be nervous about. I will ask Saint Mother Teresa and Mary to pray for you and you can ask them too." 

My eyes started tearing up as I realized God was providing me encouragement through my children. I even felt silly in the moment, thinking how crazy it had been that I had felt so nervous about doing it. What a beautiful gift that they see things so simple and black and white. Had I not had my children with me, that veil may still be sitting in my purse, never worn. My children are not afraid to be bold for God. So why should I be? 

Being open to life is a cooperation with God's will. It is a way of saying you are open to his plan for your family and abandoning that control we all wish we could have. It is realizing that God will give you the financial means to provide for these children he has entrusted to you. It is being an example to the world that yes you are different... and yes you love your husband and the gift that can come out of your love. It is knowing that not every day will be easy, but knowing every day will be blessed. 

When you follow the will of God, you are growing closer to the divine and to the way we were originally intended to be. God can only bless this abundantly. I have definitely seen this to be true in our lives. 

Prayer Time

I can't even say how many times I have been told to set aside an hour for prayer each day. I have always loved the idea in theory, but did not think it was very realistic for someone with young children. With waking up in the night all the time, I could not possibly imagine giving up a second of sleep... for any reason!

Through an Advent retreat I did online, I made it a goal to try to read the gospel and spend some time in prayer each day. I realized in my busy schedule this was not working during the day. Once the kids woke up in the morning it was not possible. They were hungry and we needed to start Hudson's school right away or else it was hard to get him motivated. Quiet prayer was not possible in the afternoon either since nap time was constantly being interrupted and sometimes did not even happen. Even if I did get a moment to sit down and have some quiet prayer time, I was so distracted. I struggled with the thoughts of all I had to do hanging over me. I remember feeling frustrated that I could not find just 10 minutes to myself to even think.

One morning, Sam woke me up at 5:30. After nursing him back to sleep, I was wide awake. I made some coffee, took out my journal, reflected on the gospel and spent an hour in the silence of my house without a single little person begging me to make them breakfast. It was glorious! That particular day I noticed I had so much more grace than usual. I had more patience, I thought more about my actions and longed for some more quiet prayerful time with the Lord.

I decided from that moment on that I would try to set an alarm for 5:45 each day. I weighed out the fact that even if I lost sleep, my sanity for the day would be greater if I could have that hour with the Lord. I figured too, God would fill in the gaps and give me energy where and when I needed it.

My morning prayer time has turned into something I honestly look forward to from the moment I am finished until I get to do it again the next morning. There is something about waking up and starting your day off in silence with God. I do have to say my coffee drinking significantly increased with my 5:45 alarm! But hey, God provides.

I am realizing the more time I spend with God, the more time I long to spend with him. I have a greater appreciation for silence and an even greater appreciation for the time I get to spend with my children. It's amazing how your mood can change when you are not being pulled out of bed, or awakened by a crying child in the morning. Our mornings have become very peaceful around here. It really is true, if you give God time he will multiply and bless it!

So I challenge you, if you have not done it yet, set your alarm and give yourself some quiet time with God in the morning. It does not have to be an hour at first. Try 15 minutes. You owe it to yourself, your spouse, your children and most importantly to God, the one who created time itself!

Epiphany!

Although we will not celebrate Epiphany until Sunday, today is the true Epiphany. This is a feast that I have either breezed by in the past or not really paid much attention to. It is easy to do as I tend to  focus on Advent leading up to the birth of Christ. Once Jesus is born, even though it is still Christmas, I have moved on in my mind to the next thing. In doing this though, I realize I have really missed out on such a beautiful feast day.

- The Three Kings followed a star. These were not Jews, they were foreign kings. They did not grow up hearing about the Messiah, nor dreaming about his coming. Yet they were drawn to Jesus. Oh how I wish I could be filled with such faith, such trust. I am also reminded of the beauty of how God can work in the lives of anyone, even if they are unaware of it. 

- The Three Kings brought Gifts. This makes me wonder, what gifts do I have to give to the king? When I think of gifts, I tend to think of money and physical gifts. There are so many ways though in my everyday life that I can give gifts to Jesus. I can offer mercy and love where it is undeserved and I can give Jesus the time he is owed. I can give my time to others in a way that glorifies God. I can truly give the gift of myself to others. 

- The Three Kings adored the Lord. These were kings, yet they bowed down before the King of Kings. They showed humility and Love by adoring this tiny child. How Mary and Joseph must have been humbled by this scene! I am challenged to think about how I adore the Lord and my own need to be humble. 

If we just breeze past this feast day, we miss out on a chance to seek the lord, a reminder to assess our own gifts of self (Time, talent and treasures) and a moment to stop and think about the importance of adoring our Savior. 

Here is how we celebrated the Epiphany! 

The Three Wise Men finally made it to baby Jesus. We read our favorite book with the three wise men. (Humphrey's First Christmas. My children find this book hilarious!) I made the kids cereal Crowns. I used Cereal with raisins and strawberries for the jewels. I know it is a stretch, but the kids totally went for it 😉. I also gave them a coloring page. I am always surprised at how excited the kids get over my little thrown together celebrations. Thank you Lord for the simplicity of children and their Joy in the little things! 

2017 Catholic Planner

In deciding I want to be more organized this year, I wanted to find a very concrete way to do it. My top needs in getting organized included:

- Finding a way to live out the Church calendar
- Meal planning
- Daily Journaling
- A place to write down daily and monthly tasks.

I needed all of this in one place so I would not forget about things. The best way to do this would be a planner or some sort of organizer. I immediately decided it needed to be something I could physically write in, rather than imputing into a calendar in my phone.  I think there is something to be said about physically writing something down. The art of writing is being lost at times with so much technology! There is beauty in the written word. This is something I want to value and encourage not only with myself, but with my children.

I started my search of trying to find the perfect planner. Travis stumbled upon a Catholic planner he found online. I was very excited, but was soon disappointed when I realized the planner was not really designed with a mom in mind.  

With some prayer and encouragement from the Holy Spirit and Travis (and a week of being sick and unable to do anything but lay on the couch) I began working on my own vision of a Catholic Planner. I am really excited in how it turned out and hope this will be a great start to staying organized and focusing on Christ in this new year. 

New Year, New Goals....Including this Blog!

It's 2017 and with a new year there are so many possibilities!

I usually come up with a few very unrealistic goals for the year. Then, I get lost in the business of everyday life and completely forget about my goals for the year. Right now I am constantly engrossed in diaper changes, breaking up fights, cooking, cleaning and trying to provide love and care for the incredible little people God has blessed me with. This is my calling right now. I can say I honestly love and have always dreamed of this calling. That being Said, the calling of Motherhood can be all consuming emotionally and even physically exhausting. It is selfless and your greatest payment is laughter and kisses (Who can argue with that!). It is definitely the most sanctifying thing I will ever do! Keeping this in mind, I am taking into account my stage in life and trying to be realistic in my goal setting.

1. I am going to read and write again. This blog is my attempt at writing again. I am also going to try to read a book each month. A book that's just for me. Somewhere along the way, I forgot about these two loves of mine and let them fall by the wayside. It is time to bring them back! 

2. I want to get organized. Our time is from God. If I want to honor God in all aspects of my life, I have to be responsible with my time. The more I plan, the smoother our household runs.  Of course, putting God first is crucial to time management. It's amazing how he multiplies our time when we give it to him before anything else. 

3. I refuse to feel overwhelmed. I chose Joy. Let me be honest, life is just pure chaos sometimes. I spend the majority of my day trying to keep Hudson and Caleb from wrestling each other to death, all while Annie cries that somebody is being "mean" to her or throwing a gigantic tantrum. Meanwhile, Samson wants to be held, nursed to sleep, held while sleeping and then repeat. There are moments (like when everybody looses it in the car) that I can suddenly feel overwhelmed. These are the moments when I desperately have to call on the Lord for some major grace. I realize though that even in these moments there are gifts. While Hudson and Caleb are tackling and wrestling, I hear laughter and see these boys are best friends. What a gift to have someone so close to you to love so much. My sweet Annie... oh that precious little toddler voice! I know I will miss it someday. Samson's constant need for me to hold him... I can feel like it is a hinderance sometimes because there is so much I need to get done, but on the other hand, the way he smiles at me and touches my face with his sweet little hands truly melts my heart. My point is that even in the hard or exhausting moments that don't go my way, there is still joy.

4. I want to enjoy the every day moments. I love spending time with my husband and my kids, but sometimes I am so anxious about what needs to be done later that I miss out on
the moment.... I am definitely a Martha! I want to try to be more of a Mary. I know it is in these simple every day moments where we find Love and Love leads us to the Lord.